The Real Fear of Getting Ripped

by Allen Gil December 17, 2014

The Real Fear of Getting Ripped

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When I was a kid, I’d hit my local bookstore each month to score the latest issue of the Conan the Barbarian comic.

The mighty warrior was muscled like a maiden’s fantasy, parading around in a loin cloth, and slaying villains with one sweep of his bulging sword arm. Between the story pages were advertisements.

Among ads for things like X-Ray Specs and Sea-Monkeys were offers to help change you from a

“bag-of-bones weakling to a true He-Man.”


My parents told me it was a scam, so I didn’t get my own copy, but I always regretted never learning the secrets to gaining 25lbs OF HANDSOME, POWER-PACKED MUSCLE.

When hosting the Academy Awards, comedian Steve Martin joked that he’d do anything for a good body...

except exercise, and eat right.

That’s true for most people.

Most people want to look fit. Most people want a six pack (and not the Budweiser variety).

But most people will not work toward good health and fitness.

I’ve heard excuses that make me truly LOL.

The funniest come from men. Rather than expose the guys I’ve talked to, we’ll personify their excuses in the fictional form of one man.

We’ll call him Bob.

The funniest thing Bob told me was:

“I don’t want to get ripped.”



  • Everyone wants to get ripped.
  • Everyone wants to look good naked.
  • Everyone wants to hear the words, “You look sexy.”

But let’s say for a moment that Bob doesn’t really want to.

The good news for him is, he’ll get his wish. Inactivity and bad nutrition will ensure that his fear of “getting ripped” won’t come to pass.

Keep in mind, Bob has told me all about when he was bitchin’ back in the day, driving the girls wild with his six-pack abs, and hard body.

I asked him:

“Don’t you think your wife would like for you to be like that again?”


With condescending smugness, Bob shook his head and told me, “My wife isn’t into buff guys, she likes me as I am.”

It was hard not to laugh in his face.

I’m not sure who Bob thinks he’s kidding, but again, let’s humor him. Maybe his wife doesn’t like chiseled guys with great pecs and abs you could wash panties on.

Most women may not be into guys like Phillip Heath, but how many husbands heard their wives audibly sigh when Jacob tore his shirt off in the second Twilight movie?

I’m betting Bob’s wife would like it if he was less soft around the middle and harder everywhere else.

Another bit of comedy Bob told me was:

“I don't have time to hit the gym.”


But, Bob does make time for

  • Mad Men,
  • Walking Dead,
  • Game of Thrones

and all of his other favorite shows which he watches, comfortably from his easy chair, wolfing candy bars chased by two or three beers.

Bob somehow has it in his head that to be fit and healthy, he must live at the gym, and eat lawn trimmings.

I told him that small changes can make a huge difference.

fear first

You don’t need to contact the Jowett Institute of Physical Training for your free guide book to become an ATHLETIC, MIGHTY-MUSCLED ALL-MALE-HE-MAN. I didn’t, and I made a change.


By cutting my daily calories back to 2,000, and walking for a half hour, three days a week. As I shed weight, I became motivated to take my fitness journey further. 

I’ve suggested Bob do the same, but he’s so frightened of becoming ripped that he continues going out of his way to make sure he doesn’t drop twenty, fifteen, or even ten pounds, which would drastically improve his life.

And furthermore, Bob continues to delude himself into believing he’s okay with being flabby, and unhealthy.

Don’t be a Bob. 

Allen Gil
Allen Gil


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